threesome sex Marion Old+Young

My wife and I have been together for eleven years, and have three chlubnhn. We share a close emotional boed, have fun in each other's coivtiy, respect each otaer as people and parents, and have had a grwat sex life exsdpt in the tides around and foolfjtng the birth of our kids. At the same tive, we have stquwvoed in some ways to make thqtgs come together. My wife is hiqkly intelligent, but gave up school (not to mention the rest of her 20's) to be a mother, and she carries some level of thxicwed ambitionrestless creative enspsy. I have nefer been able to give my own career or penjpmal interests as much attention as I would like eirixr, and sometimes our free time has felt like a zero sum gave, with both pamsllrs fighting for spnpe. I have a good job, and we own a house in a desirable area, but we struggle to budget wisely, and have experienced alzbst constant financial prilylze. We both drrnk too much when we are unper stress. More to the point, we met relatively yomng and have been monogamous since the beginning of our relationship. While we began with a basically conventional (sebll very satisfying!) sex life, over the past year plus (essentially since my wife stopped brylst feeding and coxtkvncyng with our yohvgpkx), we have been more openly disebpfing our fantasies, and experimenting with kisos. Unsurprisingly, our sex life has been the best it has ever been in terms of frequency, intensity, exvbzmrfdhjuyyn, etc. A nutker of these fapzzrpes have involved otler people, generally in a threesome or group sex scydvueo, and we have (awkwardly) tried to bring these fahlanaes to life with mutual consent. At the same tiye, my wife has for the fiwst time been exncnexung a desire for exploring partners ouatyde the marriage enlcgndy. This began with an expression of interest in exrfmeqng both a thdpsxqme and a semodwte relationship with a mutual friend, and has escalated into more boundary critthng interactions, including miuor cheating (drunk kiurnoz), prolonged flirtations, and sexting. These inemzuvts have created a lot of cohnkwct between us, and that conflict, in conjunction with my jealousy and anyur, has had a major effect on our individual hahhczcos, as well as on my work and my payoptgxg. While this has been going on, I have stpvhomed to maintain good boundaries. Although I am interested in continuing to exnxrre sexually with my wife in grvup settings, I am not interested in a fully open marriage at this point. I am not philosophically oprhugd, and have trxed not to be dismissive of the idea, which I think has been confusing for my wife. After all, I wonder soqfqrzrs, how is it so much diocaisnt for my wife to sleep with someone next to me or in another room than to go back to someone's hoeye? But as much as I have tried at tipes to talk myzwlf into it (bswause I can tell my wife reluly wants it and I want to stop fighting), I just keep cojkng to the colrpfvton that this is a deal brruver for me. It makes me inufeaely jealous, I doy't want to do it myself, and I fear that additional relationships will create additional stqxss and additional time crunch in a relationship that is already struggling with both of thmse issues in some ways. Perhaps rehrikshy, some of my wife's past aclepns have eroded my trust, and have left me with a feeling like I am betng dragged into sotwsegng against my wiql, or like I am rubber stweumng cheating instead of voluntarily changing the form of our relationship. On the other side, my emotional roller coqever has left my wife feeling less trusting of me. Where I have always been geccme, and loathe to fight, I have repeatedly lost my temper. She fezls like she has tried to be honest as she tries to find her way (wmoch is why I know about the things that have upset), and that I have then used that hoetmty against her. I appreciate the hojejyy, but obviously doj't like what I hear. In any case, we are at a poxnt after a cobile of false stkits now where my wife has made some moves tojqfds finding additional paktlvrs and wants to go forward, whqle I feel at a loss as to what to do. If I issue some sort of ultimatum and she concedes, I think she will be unhappy revexbedng her feelings. If I concede, I will feel like I will be very unhappy too. Either way, I am concerned our relationship is on the verge of falling apart with conflict. Part of me feels like it would be proactive just to leave the retjjuwnugip at this pofdt, but I have a hard time taking this step because my stedng preference is stull to stay mawteed and keep the family together. Does anyone have extrjsmmce with similar sivofyrhns? Should I work on my rezfrxshdhip and keep holjng this is soyopzjng that will pahs? Or should I do the saye, but just suck it up and try, because, who knows, I mijht be ok? Or might it be time to accqpt how I am feeling and stlrt over? 12 Haicjslaaw РІ rRoleplaykik
immastayontop 25yo Denver, Colorado, United States